Daily Archives: June 19, 2006

I am crazy?!?!

i don't know if i SHOULD put this into words...

i know i am insane.. or maybe i am just insane enough to ... i don't know...

Call me crazy.. i flipped to VH1 on the tv and "black horse and the cherry tree" was playing on the channel....

it has a unique beat and i don't know why i thought..

whenever i read a good story my mind latches onto it.. into a "fantasy world" where somehow i travel to a "alternate reality" where i.. i make a diffrence?

I remember long time ago thinking of me being
like Data froms startrek... (this was during my parents divorce)
then when Startrek DS9 came on. my fantasy world i became a ODO like creature..
Its evolved over time.. being a dragonrider.. a dimensional traveler.. all sorts of things....

But lately its focused around the John Carter Universe...........

Now.. i will state this.. My phylosophy on god is that all religions that are moral face the same god.. the same one... even if its a diffrent name or that there is more then one of it/her/him/whatever pronoun you want to give the entity.... its a infinate persona... why would it limit itself.. it changes itself to suit the religions morals.. adopts behaviors and teachings to teach the people morality more...

This being i think that there is more then our reality perception... and.. i think that we could transferse this reality.. but we need a ancor.. something to guide us there.. a image and idea of the reality..

Why the long winded almost non topic parts there... I want to belive i CAN transferse.. while that song was playing i just got the idea of trying.. i focused on the spot where John Carter died.. the glade with four metors in a circle and in a plus sign (i think.. thats how i image it) and i thought GO!

I felt.. i want to say torn a bit from my body... like i feel when i have meditated but more... where i can feel my whole essence....

I don't know the full reasons i would want to go there.. Being accepted and helped to be the best i COULD be? Knowing that i had proof in my mind that i COULD NEVER deny about the entity of god? Maybe being called to serve?

All i will say now is.......

If i ever dissappear.. i mean like no trace of me... where you could not find me.. or a body or anything... trust that i am there... Maybe oneday i will come back?