Category Archives: Other

Gastroduodenal Intussusception

Well, it takes getting close to death to bring me back here to blog..

Will I keep it up? I don't know... but i felt I should go ahead and post about whats happened in the last year, and the how and why of how I was close to death.

Gastroduodenal Intussusception, Its a long medical name, but it nearly killed me. Not fast mind you but slow.

I should start this basic recount of event in June, when for some unknown reason, at that time, I had started having major stomach pains. It was not a constant pain but a occasional issue where I would have pain for a hour or so and then everything was ok.
It was bad enough that if i was not standing I could not get up.

I called my father to come get me and take me to the Emergency Room, because I did not think I could drive safely.
When he arrived I was feeling better and had some water to drink while we waited. Then it started again and we went to the ER.

Sadly they found nothing, my gallbladder was ok, no organs looked swelled or damaged, it was a unexplained mystery and the pain stopped the next day.

Looking back, I wonder if they had done a CT scan if they would have found the issue, or if it was not yet progressed far enough.
Also I believe this is where the slow process that would have killed me started.

Shortly after that I started having issues, where a hour or two after eating I would vomit up some part of the meal I had eaten,
or vomit up just bile/stomach juices.

This went on for a bit before I decided to visit a Doctor, and it was a offhand comment that I made about how co-workers were saying I had lost alot of weight and looked better that made the doctor weigh me.

I had lost nearly 60 pounds of weight, I used to be 350 a few months before now I was like 290ish.
Obviously that much weight loss indicates a serious issue.

So the doctor had some blood drawn to check my liver, and I went home with a appointment to come back about a week later for a endoscope check. ( Where the doctor checks my stomach for damage/bleeding/something odd)

I did get a call the next day telling me I needed to get on Iron supplements because my red blood cell count was so low and I was considered anemic.

Well up to then I had been feeling ok, a bit more tired, but I had been attributing that to the vomiting and the stresses that put on the body.

I found out from the Doc that I was bleeding somewhere, He just could not find where. I had brought in some stool samples in the containers they had given me on the previous visit and they showed no blood at all.

Up to this point in time I had a hard time keeping food down, I was not sure if it was the type of food, or a gluten allergy or something along that range. For example I would go to eat at the local Chinese buffet and not make it home before I had to vomit the food back up.

So, the doctor scheduled me in for a colonoscopy, to check in my large intestines for bleeding there on November the third.
Being inexperienced and reading the directions wrong I had eaten solid food the day before it, but it turned out to not be much of a issue. I still say that BBQ Chicken Burrito from Taco Bell was worth it!

One other thing he had scheduled me for was a CT scan to get a image of my guts. This turned out to be what changed my life.

When we got there they put me on fluids, and I was not really sure why they kept delaying my checkup/surgery. Eventually he did come in and tell me he was not going to do it but he did want to go in for a quick check. It was not pleasant but he was only in for a few moments.

After getting dressed I was escorted to a waiting room where my step mom, who had driven me there, was also waiting.

The doc said he was holding off the colonoscopy because the CT scans showed him something he had never seen before in his medical career, this is something I got used to hearing once we learned what it was I had.

Somehow my stomach was pulled into my small intestines, and we learned it was called Gastroduodenal Intussusception.

Now at this time, due to the vomiting and the bleeding I was having, I had been getting very little nutrients and loosing small amounts of blood faster then my body could replace, so I was very anemic.

My step mom had commented that I looked grey, my lips and face were white and looked like there was barely and blood in me.
We also learned that I was not responding to the Iron supplements.

The Doctor recommended that I head to the hospital, and recommended a surgeon to take care of me, he wanted them to give me a transfusion of blood to get the red blood cell count back up to a safe level. He also mentioned that surgery was probabbly going to have to be done to fix this issue.

Well, we headed out to the hospital, stopping at my place to get my IPOD and cell phone charger so I could keep myself entertained for a few hours. Also we stopped and got something to eat, a big mac for my step mom and a grilled chicken burger for me.

At this point, I did not realize how bad it was, my step moms blood pressure was sky high with worry, and I was being stupid and not realizing how bad of a shape I was in, I thought they would put the blood in me, I would talk to the doctor and be released till I needed to come back in.

Boy was I so wrong!

They admitted me in, and put me in the ICU department, and put a IV in, started liquids in.

To let you know when I was admitted my hemoglobin count was at a 4.XX.

This was my brush with death and as close as I ever want to get to it till its my time to go.

They wound up putting six pints of blood in me to get my hemoglobin up over 8, which they considered a safe level.
Now remember I thought I would be going home after this and was very let down that I found out I could not leave.

I spoke with Dr Richard Terry, I don't think its a bad thing to give his name out because he is the one that fixed the major issue, and I was moved to a regular room that morning since I was no longer in as much danger.

I will say one annoyance I had was the stupid "fall risk" bracelet they had put on me, but I did have fun with it later on.
I do understand why they put it on and it was not fun being in ICU, I had to get unhooked from a few things to get up and pee.
And I had to pee into a urinal so they could see how much I was pissing versus how much liquid they were putting in.

So I am in the room, I sorta wish I had gotten pictures to post here for memories.

My father who has to work in Atlanta GA and mother who lives near Elisabethtown KY both came down to be with me.
I realize both of them were afraid badly for me, including my step mom.

My mom took a big risk, she did not have time to spend with me but stayed for nearly 3 weeks coming every day to spend a few hours with me and when I had my surgery she was there for a few days to make sure I was all right and help me.
She could have lost her job but did not thankfully, though she is looking around to see what options she has for a better job.

My father could not take that much time away from work so he stayed for a few days went back and kept working, I know several of his co-workers were very concerned about me and I thank them for there good wishes.

I will say this.. I am a SLOB at the best of times, and my dad and step mom gave me a wonderful present!
A clean apartment.
I know I could never have gotten this place this clean in any length of time!

So moving back to the hospital talk they kept watch on my blood counts taking samples every day, eventually this got easier because they wanted to start feeding me.
So you ask yourself, "How can feeding you help with taking blood draws?"

A special IV called a PICC line, it is put into the upper part of your arm and the catheter line runs up your arm in the main vein and stops near your heart.
Now this IV could allow greater flow of liquids and was designed for long term use and had two ports.
This would let them draw blood for tests without needing to stick me.

I did have some issues getting it in, though the IV specialist that came to put it in did a bang up wonderful job. She did have to restart it at one point because there was a issue.

So they could feed me nutrients directly into my blood stream, bypassing the need to digest and all the good things about eating. They called this feeding a TPN. But they did let me have a diet, it was called "clear liquids", this consisted of broths jello and water apple juice lemon aid and Italian Ice deserts.

Though I had to stay away from red because they did not want the food dye to be confused with blood in the watery stools I did have.

So I spent about a week on this food getting stronger and talking to the doctor.

While waiting we talked to a Oncologist who basically said he did not think there was any cancer during all this. And this started a bit of a conflict with Dr Terry.

I had been ordered a few tests, a CT scan and a bone marrow test and another endoscope test.
I will say this, the anesthesiologist who put me under for the endoscope test I disliked. He did not warn me or let me know it was happening. I started to feel weird and figured he was putting me under.

The CT scan I could understand, but the bone marrow test was to check for cancer, which the Oncologist had said in his opinion there was no worry of.

I had asked to speak with Dr Terry about what we were doing and why the tests were being ordered and as you guessed I did not like how we were being treated, Dr Terry was not giving me the info I needed to know whats going on.
But he came after a long day to talk to me and after then I felt safe in his hands and trusted him.

We did talk to another Dr Siegien, who I loved how she works.
In fact I am going to see if she can be my primary doctor from now on.

She had checked to see at one point if a at this point third CT scan was needed. We were going to scan for the arteries to make sure there was a need for a arterial specialist for the operation. And she found out for us that the CT scan would not give us any more data then what we had.
I had raised objections to this based on the amount of radiation that this device gives off when being used properly.
I did find out that if I had like 10 of them in three years time i have a higher risk of getting some cancers but I don't plan on having too many more from this point forward.

I should add at this point that Gastroduodenal Intussusception is so rare for my age group, there have been just a handful of cases of this since the late 1800's.
It happens more in children and babies then adults.

Being a WOW addict and also getting addicted a bit to the game EVE, I could not login at all while I was there, Sad face.

But my dad brought his laptop in which did enough, so I could read some news sites, keep up with WOW news and watch Netflix on it.
So I stayed sane, walked a bunch.
Dr Terry wanted me walking alot so that it would help in the recovery, in fact the day after I walked 3 times around the floor I was on. I later found out that was about a quarter miles worth of walking.

So the day of the surgery comes and I go in.. waking up with my parents there and finding out that they found the issue fully.

It turns out that there was a tumor (insert voice clip of Arnold Schwarzenegger saying "Its not a Tumor") that was benign.
It was the size of a chicken egg and was attached in the stomach and had gotten caught in my duodenum, which is the first part of the small intestine.
This was causing a blockage which is why I was vomiting. Food could not go past it easily so, it had to come out.

Now why was I bleeding, I have not mentioned it till now but its believed that the tumor kept going in and out of the duodenum and drawing the stomach in and out.
This constant in and out is like if you kept scratching your skin, it would eventually bleed.
And that's why I was anemic.

So I lost about 20% of my stomach, a small portion of my duodenum, the portion of the duodenum that was removed connected to the gallbladder so the gallbladder was removed. Also a small part of my pancreas that was around that connection was removed.

So for a while I was on a epidural, and and NG tube, which sucked my stomach juices out. It was not pretty or nice smelling.

Now when your on a epidural they also put you on a catheter, and when the epidural came out about six hours later the catheter could come out. I had to deal with a pee bag for about 4 days.
I will tell you that was a burning sensation that I hope NEVER to have again.

Then the campaign which I christened "FARTS FOR FREEDOM" started. I even made a sign that got taped to the TV.
As I understood, the NG tube, which i hated, would be removed once we proved that, one my stomach juices were not coming out dark, and two that I started farting.
Why are farts important, because you swallow air occasionally, and that air becomes a fart later on.
So if I could fart then my guts are working.
Then I started having watery poo, because there was nothing but liquid in me.

Also shortly after I got into the room I started to run a fever, to the PICC Line was removed since they did not see any other source for the fever. It was later proven nothing was wrong with it.

About 5 days after the surgery the NG Tube was removed I was allowed water to drink.

The idea was to test my stomach and see how it reacted, nausea would be a bad sign. Vomiting would be dangerous since it could tear my insides back up.

I will say water after having a NG tube was a godsend!

Then the next day I was allowed the Clear liquid diet again.
Broth and jello never taster that good!!

Also a side note, the week before I had lots of broth, so much that my mom had commented that I had become a critique of the broth, having too much salt or not enough flavor.

Then I was allowed the full liquid diet the next day!
I was allowed oatmeal and Ice Cream! OMG so tasty and I mean the oatmeal!

Then I was allowed to have a special diet, I could not have all the solid food on the hospitals menu but I was allowed alot. The foods I can eat right now are meant to be low in fiber and easy to digest.
This way there is less strain on my guts while everything heals.

My first solid food in nearly a month was spaghetti and sauce and carrots!
OMG so delicious!

Then a few hours later I had another meal and it was a hamburger!

I have to admit, I cried alot.

For a while I could not shower after the surgery, and before when I had the TPN in We had to cover it with saran wrap or a bag and tape it.
For a shower without any hoses or anything poking out of me.
It was moving.

Then the magic happened, I had a turd!

My bowels proved they are working. It was magical to me.

The next day I had scrambled eggs and cooked ham.

This was the day I was to leave the hospital.

It took time to check out and get going but I got out.

My step mom and my dad wanted me to stay at there place so that my step mom could look after me.
But family was in for thanks giving there were few places to sleep. That would have been ok, but someone got a stomach bug.
That meant I could not be there without risking getting sick and vomiting.

So I got dropped off at my place where I am still. I really wanted to come back to my home.

So My step mom dropped me off and I had some food TV dinners and spaghetti noodles so I was good.
And She came back the next day with some more food for me to eat.

I have been enjoying playing wow and eve again.. relaxing and more.

I even walked the quarter mile or so to the gas station to get some soda, of course caffeine free and sugar free, and some ice cream.

Why am I walking around, right now I am not allowed to drive. My reactions would be slow and if I got in a wreck my stomach and guts could be damaged much worse then in a normal wreck.

Today my Dad came by and we went to walmart and I bought presents for my nieces and nephew, getting whats on there list and more!

So that covers most of it, I am sure I left out some things, but its been as I said alot during this time a "interesting experience".
Thursday I go to get the stitches removed and that's one of the last things to do.

I will add that my work the HR manager and the Short Term Disability departments have been wonderful.
I am getting a paycheck still and have a job to go back to.

I am eager to go back when the doc releases me but I think it will be near the end of December before he does.

One surprising thing going through the notes me and my mom made is that the doc wants me on pre-natal vitamins because it will help me rebuild my blood cells and heal better. Just interesting.

Also I know I did not mention my mom much but she stayed with me alot, being the mental and spiritual help I needed.
She started a notepad of who had come in and what they said keeping track for me about things, translating medical speak to normal speak for me.
Without her help I don't know how I could have coped and dealt with everything.

I hope you enjoyed reading, I know I may not have gotten everything or written it as a good story but it tells the basic facts and more.

Happy Birthday To ME!!! & RL stuff

Well.. this is quite odd, my last post was on 07-11-2008 and its been three months and 27 days since I have bored you guys with my mundane details of my life.

That WILL NOT HAPPEN AGAIN. I have done alot and not done some things, but I will probabbly have to split this post up into two or three posts.

I have to make a comment in regards to some feedback I got from my last post that practically made me not want to post again.
I have decided for the moment to "hide" this forum/blog supporting wherever I can except on my direct blog.
It was in regards to Erectile Issues, I have them and I am not sorry I make several someones squick factors trigger.

All I have to say about it is, "GROW UP!"

One, I am not making you read this blog, its your choice.
Two, the places I post are either owned by me, or areas where one can be frank and open
Three, I did not harm you by posting and talking about it.

I believe that If it harms no one, then do it, and that you should protect the weak from the strong. (from Lazlo Zalezac's stories John Carter and Ed Biggers )

This I think is a good guide to life and what you can do.

I also would like to point out another story with a few bits if information "The Facts of Life" from "The Millionaire Next Door" by Lazlo Zalezac

The Facts Of Life

Life is not fair.
No one is exempt from death.
Physics rules the universe and biology rules life.
The universe does not care.
The only constant in life is change.
There is always a choice.
Wishing never makes it so.
A person can't exceed their limits.
A person is responsible for their own happiness.
It is impossible to change the character of another.

I think these are a good guide to fixing your own life and getting along with most people. I have thought about it some and tried to follow both principals to better my life.

I will continue to post FULL updates to my health until you can show me that I have caused actual harm. I will consider your points even if you can't show harm but please don't try to change me. If there is change that needs to be doing I am the one that has to do it.

I will give a concession, and Hide the issue about my erectile problems.

Back to the good stuff!!!!

Alot has happened Since my last post so we will start with the medical.

I as of this moment typing weigh 318.7 LBS which is 62lbs down from where I was, though if i had not eaten at the chineese this week (twice) and did not have a large dinner (and breakfast (leftover cake and steak) I would probabbly be a few pounds lighter.

I am going to list my blood pressure from my doctor visits (I always text msg my step mom Linda with it)
07-24-2008 150/80
08-13-2008 130/80
09-03-2008 130/80
09-04-2008 126/70
09-17-2008 142/90
09-18-2008 136/86
10-16-2008 144/82
10-30-2008 122/80

So there is a downward trend except for in mid September where I ran out of the Spironolactone that I am supposed to take and it went up for a bit.
Overall Its alot better, and I feel better, but since it got cold I have not been walking, though all I need is a good pair of gloves which I will try getting today while I will be at the mall.

I do need to talk to him again since I am getting light headed at times easily, like when I stand up (alot) or go up/down alot of steps my heart started racing and my blood pressure dropped about 5 minutes after I went up and down some steps talking with my dad the other day. So it could be dipping still too much.

I caught a MAJOR COLD / laryngitis (first time I ever had that) and left work on the sat 11th of oct after being there for only 1 hour..
I tell you it was not fun when I could not stand up much and walk around. I could not breath much so what little sleep I got was on my couch.

I did not get back in until 10/20 due to being out 4 days sick and then my off days. My grandfather on my dads side died a few weeks before and since I have the SUV My father wanted to use it to go down to South Carolina and pick some things up and help my Grandmother move out of the home.

So I drove a bit down, and all the way back up, I was not tired too much from the driving but I was still weak and not able to help much with the heavy boxes (had a hard time keeping cool and that lead to heat exhaustion)

But we got back alright and my grandma gave me the clock that was over her mantel because I remember the chimes it makes when I was over, and a old wooden carving/sculpture my aunt gave her (she was going to give it to charity) of a Indian, which I saved for my mom (though I am tempted to keep it for myself).

My father got my grandpa's Air Compressor (which he really wanted) and a dresser with a marble top (one piece was broken) but it was disassembled somewhat and easy to load.

We also got for my Alexis and Nathan the Super Nintendo that was there, it also had a bunch of games. (they are getting it for Xmas)

I also had a MRI to see if my pituitary glands in my brain were working right, and found out, those machines make me claustrophobic.

They tried to get me into the circular one at the hospital but my shoulders touched the sides (the outside doesn't spin) but I could not listen to anything there and it was just too close for me.

My Dr rescheduled a MRI with another company and later that day I got into a "open MRI" which is not really open. I honestly think they just need to make the magnets bigger for more powerful field so they can have more space for people so they don't feel so enclosed.
The head Unit I had to wear almost killed the deal as well... as soon as they got it around me it felt tight (almost touching my nose) but I calmed down and luckily they were able to have a radio on which the blasted FM transmitter worked and was able to distract me enough (along with closing my eyes and not looking @ the small space I was put into).

I have to say any future MRI's I will get will be open ones, just for the simple fact vs the newer ones, I can move around more, my shoulders and middle body can move and I can move to a side and move my hands around alot (which the other one would not allow)

Well the results of the MRI was that there is nothing wrong with my glands and I am now on a cream that i put on my belly/arms that slowly absorbs the testosterone into the blood stream slowly.
Though I wish there was a pill but I understand the cream goes better due to the fact it absorbs slower and the pill would require multiple doses a day or something.. .. Personally I want the pill which would be easier to add to my pill regimen.

Wow, so much data and two more things to bring up, My work "Comcast" had a town hall for the call center the other day and I was able to go (been going to docs the last two times) and learned some good things.
As a market we are doing better then others but not what was expected (due to the economy)
But Comcast is now paying a Differential for people working late into the night.
For my Time I get in I will be getting a $1.00 raise per hour!!!! WOOT WOOT *GO MEM* *GO MEM* *ITS YOUR BIRTHDAY*

Speaking of birthdays, I am turning 28 TODAY!!!!
My Family gets together usually for a dinner and cake and presents. And I was looking forward to a steak dinner at my fathers and seeing my nieces and nephew.

Sadly, My sister Lisa somehow got the dates wrong or something, and had swapped days with someone at her work and could not come. (which means my niece Alexis and Nathan could not come :( ) But my sister Chris was able to come over and I got to spend some time with her and my niece Raven was over (she is so cute but I am not allowed to post photos of them online per there mothers requests)
(Just a FYI Chris and me have for some reason never gotten along, so I see the reversal of them coming to the party as unique)

So we had the Cake and the Ice Cream after dinner *BURP* (it was a very very tender steak and potatoes salad and mixed veggies and mac and cheese (for the kids though I took some)

I got two cards, one from my Grandmother and another from my father which had some money.

Well I did find a present for myself, I was walking around Walmart Looking for some "hunting" gloves so I could control my Phone when doing a walk at night and I came across this.

I have been unsatisfied with the FM Transmitters that I have been using. It usually has bleed over from other stations because there is not enough "open" radio space for it to work, plus it gets popping and hissing alot just because its a low power device.

So I went ahead and bought it as my birthday present from my father and me. And plan to have it installed later today!!!! WOOT!!!!

So alots happened in the last three months and 27 days, but I plan on posting more (I hope) and being responsible for my own happiness and not letting others have that much influence over me.

(stay tuned I will have more up to date soon in a day or so about my RS Fun hopefully tonight)

Slayer Mask, I am Old Man & New Car

Well its been about a month and Its time to update my blog and add all the new stuff...

This past month has been very busy.. especially the last few days..

Three Major things have happened, and I will start off with the Runescape Acomplishments.


*DANCES* I did 35 tasks in a row.. I blocked two monsters, Steel Dragons, I just hate them.. there are not many to kill and I want to power though slayer assignments, and Warped Terrorbirds, NO THANKS!!!!!

I gained 4 Slayer levels.. And i am Sad.. Now my Runecrafting is lower then Slayer :(

I got A Range level, I might want to invest in a Cannon since it seems so much faster (this is one skill that i wont take slow if i decide to power level)

I went up 2 Strength Levels 1 Attack 1 Defence

Also I have to say... I am going to have to try out Aniska0's Cookies, they sound delicious


I got Two Summoning Levels Via Juna

Woot If i wanted to I can teleport for faster nature runecrafting.

And my Proudest Achevement


WOOT, I was just dang lucky to have 3-4 streams for a long time :) but that's alot :)

Now onto the second thing, if you judge a man as being old by having to take alot of medication, then I have arrived and am now a official "Old Man"

I FINALLY went to the docs three weeks ago (from time of posting) and I am glad.. My chances of living past 50 have gone up TREMENDOUSLY.

My mother recommended this doc when she mentioned her legs were no longer swollen and i told her my right one was.

Week # 1

First off, I am very fat, turns out i was at 380lbs just about.

When i went in My Blood Pressure was at 175/110, and i did not realize how bad it was.

The attractive nurses tried to take blood from my arm and that was a failure.. my veins just wont get stuck.
They tried twice there, then on my hand, which got it.

I also did a metabolic test where i sat and breathed though a tube for 10 minutes.

Turns out if i exercise some and with normal daily activity i burn about 4k calories a day.. and they want me eating about 2400 a day to loose weight.

now the doc there was not the one my mother recomended, but i was not going to go back again the next day.

so he put me on tekturna and gave me a 5 week supply (which i need to return the 4 bottles that i have not used)

Week # 2

I go in and my blood pressure has gone down some 148/102, which is a good improvement on the high side and some on the low :)

The Doc is the one my mother recommended and so far I think he is doing a good job. He saw the results from the test and saw that my blood sugar was normal for someone who had fasted (I sleep usually till 2pm and the appts are all around 3 pm) so I had not eaten before going for that first blood test and they could run it as me having fasted.

But my testosterone levels were WAY TO LOW for a man my age.. maybe 50's but not 27...

So he had me come in that next day and fast to have my insulin checked. (which was July 3rd)

The doc puts me on Tekturna with a water pill and Tricor and Niaspan to lower my cholesterol (which i believe will do another blood draw for later) Also he prescribed a shampoo (which i have not gotten yet because its to popular its rare) and a cream for my psoriasis on my legs.

So now i am pissing alot more.... :/

Week # 3

I go in and my Blood Pressure is now @ 150/86 which is a HUGE decrease on the resting side, and not much change on the other.. The water pills have helped ALOT.

I also have lost 10lbs!!!!!

I also get the results back from the test, my insulin is WAY TO HIGH, so he thinks we can combat the insulin and that in turn will help the testosterone go back up. (this is a Major relief since its supposed to give me more energy and *ahem* Between the sheets functions will work alot better then current.

He also wants me working out alot more.. walking 7 hours a week (1 hour a day)

And he wants me on a Diet pill.

So We have added some medication, Metformin to fight the insulin and raise testosterone, and Phentermine to block hunger cravings. (Phentermine is the main ingredient in Phen Phen)

So I have to say, I think it helped since i was at the Chinese place and was not very hungry at all today... But that could have been the third thing...

Lately my car has been having overheating problems.. driving to and from work (18 miles total abouts) its not affected.

But driving in the scorching afternoon sun @ 2-3 causes the radiator to overheat, and I think the reservoir got super heated steam/water and melted a hole.. or a hose is leaking on the bottom.

So traveling like 30 miles to the doc and 30 back has overheated the engine twice, (stopped before anything happened and let it cool and added water) but the leaks the cause.. it seems to fail more when its very hot.

So, today my dad calls me when i am near asleep and tells me he is bringing a car over for me to look at.

It turns out his work (sprint) is selling a 2006 Ford Escape, with 61k Miles and Warranty on it still!!!!

There asking price, 8300, and my father said after driving it down that he wishes he enver told me about it cause he wants it.

It has power locks windows mirrors WORKING AC (in the 11 years I have been driving I have NEVER HAD WORKING AC) along with a remote for locking/unlocking.

Since it was used by a phone company it has one of those metal grids behind to hang things on and keep boxes from flying up and hitting the driver. (IamJosh got the naughty thought in a private chat quickly even though Aniska0 was there as well)

Sadly its not a Hybrid but it does get 17-23 mpg (what I averaged with the Honda when I was not being cautious so this is not that bad, but for almost 20 years of new technology I expected better.

So I went with my step mom to a credit union that she knows, we signed up, got accepted. (got to take in my latest pay stub for them tommorow/today) and the check will go out tommorow/today. And hopefully by next Wednesday at the latest tommorow/today at the earliest, I will have a new SUV!!!!!!


So thats the long update for today.. I want to start posting more about weight and blood pressure so I can be more motivated.

Thanks for reading :)

Just a Few Jokes from

I found these two jokes from a runescape chat room (the bash links were posted there)


so i had a checkup at the doctor a couple months ago
i waited in the goddamn lobby for like 2 hours
i was just starting to doze off when they called me back into one of the exam rooms
so i sit on this chair for like 30 more mins, and then fall asleep
i wake up and have no idea what time it is or how long i've been waiting
so 20 minutes later after I finished reading the Hispanic Business Weekly
I start diggin through the drawers in the exam table and his desk drawer
i find some hypos and don't touch them, some dressing gowns, and then i get to the drawer marked "OB/GYN"
i open it up, take a peeky-peek inside, and what do I see? Speculums and rectal dilators.
At this point I'm in his desk rolly-chair
with about 40 rubber gloves in my pockets for later use
so I grab a speculum in each hand
and start making them sing and talk like little ducks
i was rooting around for a sharpie and couldn't find one
so i put them down and did my glove-trick
i stretched a rubber glove over my head and blew it up
then i grabbbed the speculums and started spinning around in his chair
glove inflated on my head the size of two basketballs
speculum in each hand
spinning in his office chair
i hear footsteps and as i'm extending my legs to slow down, the door opens
the doctor is standing there with my chart in his hand
i stopped spinning and just sat there, looking at him through the thin film of the glove
he was like "Corey.....?"
I said "Yep."
held up the speculums.
said, "I got bored."
and he was like "That's quite a trick with those gloves. Where did you learn that?"
I said "Many doctor's offices in many states."
He was like "You want to take some with you?" as I got up
I pulled the wad out of my pocket and said "Already did."
then I walked out and i heard him laughing like a goddamn maniac as soon as the door was closed
then the other day i go in again rofl and he just hands me a brand new unopened box of 100 gloves
i was gonna ask for some speculums just to fuck with him but I was afraid he'd give me some

IronChef Foicite: well, there's a lot of reasons
IronChef Foicite: i mean, roses only last like a couple weeks
IronChef Foicite: and that's if you leave them in water
IronChef Foicite: and they really only exist to be pretty
IronChef Foicite: so that's like saying
IronChef Foicite: "my love for you is transitory and based solely on your appearance"
IronChef Foicite: but a potato!
IronChef Foicite: potatos last for fucking ever, man
IronChef Foicite: in fact, not only will they not rot, they actually grow shit even if you just leave them in the sack
IronChef Foicite: that part alone makes it a good symbol
IronChef Foicite: but there's more!
IronChef Foicite: there are so many ways to enjoy a potato! you can even make a battery with it!
IronChef Foicite: and that's like saying "i have many ways in which I show my love for you"
IronChef Foicite: and potatos may be ugly, but they're still awesome
IronChef Foicite: so that's like saying "it doesn't matter at all what you look like, I'll still love you"

Top this for a speeding ticket …

plane plane plane
testing testing

Top this for a speeding ticket ...

Two British traffic patrol officers from North Berwick were involved in an unusual incident while checking for speeding motorists on the A1 Great North Road. One of the officers used a hand-held radar device to check the speed of a vehicle approaching over the crest of a hill, and was surprised when the speed was recorded at over 300 mph. Their radar suddenly stopped working and the officers were not able to reset it.

Just then a deafening roar over the treetops revealed that the radar had in fact latched on to a NATO Tornado fighter jet which was engaged in a low-flying exercise over the Border district, approaching from the North Sea.

Back at police headquarters the chief constable fired off a stiff complaint to the RAF Liaison office.

Back came the reply in true laconic RAF style:

"Thank you for your message, which allows us to complete the file on this incident. You may be interested to know that the tactical computer in the Tornado had detected the presence of, and subsequently locked onto, your hostile radar equipment and automatically sent a jamming signal back to it. Furthermore, an air-to-ground missile aboard the fully-armed aircraft had also automatically locked onto your equipment. Fortunately the pilot flying the Tornado recognized the situation for what it was, quickly responded to the missile systems alert status, and was able to override the automated defence system before the missile was launched and your hostile radar installation was destroyed.

Good Day ..."

“Politically Correct My Ass” (joke/maybe real?)

Found this on the interwebs last night and wanted to post it. its not politically correct at all and I consider it just a joke...

(don't know if its real or not, but enjoy)


A lady about 8 months pregnant got on a bus. She noticed the man
opposite her was smiling at her. She immediately moved to another

This time the smile turned into a grin, so she moved again. The
man seemed more amused.

When on the fourth move, the man burst out laughing,she
complained to the driver that she was being stalked and
harrassed; and so the driver had the man arrested.

The case came up in court.

The judge asked the man (about 20 years old) what he had to say
for himself. The man replied, "Well your Honor, it was like
this: When the lady got on the bus, I couldn't help but notice
her condition.

She sat down under a sign that said, "The Double Mint Twins are
Coming" and I grinned."

"Then she moved and sat under a sign that said, "Logan's
Liniment will reduce the swelling, and I had to smile.

"Then she placed herself under a deodorant sign that said,
"William's Big Stick Did the Trick", and I could hardly contain

"BUT, your Honor, when She moved
the fourth time and sat under a sign that said, Goodyear Rubber
could have prevented this Accident... I just lost it."


Just a joke pic, and some digg links

This one has been floating around in my files for about a month now..
What do you think of this "blonde's Future" ... ime_a_Must
I think this is stupid.. people... when you realize you made a mistake OWN UP TO IT!!!! ... _ll_you_do
I am SURPISED this tug boat kept on going

I am including the pics here Just in case (copied Directly from the other blog)

The towboat is approaching the bridge with barges loaded with coal.

This frame gives you an idea of how fast the river is running. Obviously at or near flood stage

Oh CRAP!!! The bridge didn't open and the boat can't stop. Notice that the tug has released the barges.
He is backing as hard as possible to try and avoid a collision with the bridge.

Can't back down enough against the current.

Uh Oh! The current has swung the boat around sideways.

The cook thinks maybe something isn't quite right.

The boss is going to be REAL mad!

Uh... Boss? Do we have flood insurance on this boat?

Uh.... Boss? You ain't gonna believe what we just did!

She's low, but the flag is still flying.

The wheelhouse door and the door in the second deck are now open.
Look close at the bottom righthand side of the picture and you will see that the bridge guardrail is underwater.

Look at the water pouring out of the second deck doorway.

The working deck is still underwater, but rising.

Notice anything unusual? Look at the smoke coming from the exhausts. This thing is running!!!

Notice the propwash at the rear of the tug. The boat is upright and back under power.

Ho Hum. Just another day on the river.